Monday, October 10, 2005

i'm all misty...sniff...

No, i'm not here to diss this whole concept. Apart from the fact that it's so outdated, it's also currently a fad to give it a thought. When loves runs out on you, what else do you do, but to take up your yoke and try out the method that you abhorr. Sure, it's embarrassing. It has to be, bad enough you have to swallow your pride. Ahem...

And so, the marriage markets open it's doors to your very sore being, as your trudge past the caskets of resumes and profiles, your parents (picture this in slow mo) are running amok in the crowds, dizzy from excitement, shaking hands with the vendors, clicking on free kiosks, uploading your details and smiling (widely) at everyone, nodding their heads toward you with pride, and probably hugging you more than they used to, kissing you, telling you what a good child you are.

Snap!

Urgh, well that isn't exactly the scenario really. Marriage is and always will be a step in the life of an individual. You run out of juice with the folks, you come of your own and the next natural biological, psychological step would be to look for a mate. Some find it on their own, other let the parents do it, and some others now use the technology we call the wide web. Some others, very different from the rest, mesh all the three to find love, acceptance, blessing and life together.

Hmmm...

Which one am i? Honestly, i'm a gazpacho of everything. i'm a wounded soldier, battle scarred and limping into a hospice where laid down to rest among the other brave, i battle it out with my mind wondering what the bloddy hell, just went wrong here? No answers so far. Ah well...
Well i wouldn't really relegate this little mishap to an Ah well status, but what can one honestly do, eh? I'm laid bare, inards scattered for all to see. I'v detested the whole arranged marriage concept really. Cause what i've seen of it, has been pretty pathetic, so i just assumed - it isn't for me.

Over time, it has changed, y'know. Things are a lot more open and discussed, and the good thing is your choice counts this time. And that's heartening. So, officially, i'm on the market. My profile is doing the rounds, and yet....i can't let some tuggy feeling out my mind. Maybe it's my fantasy person again, coming up from all the murky experiences, and sending out telepathic messages - hehehe.

I never did really let got of my fairy tale meeting. I can picture it.

I'm walking down this Hyde Park lookalike place (well maybe it is Hyde park, i'm not sure!).

It's lonely, the streets are packed with people strolling by with not a care for who's around them, i'm a nobody here, i've something in my hands, it could be an umbrella or maybe it's bag, and as i walk on the side streets, looking at the trees, and the occassional loner with a book, pet or lover - i suddenly stop look to the right and turn. No apparent reason. I start working (right turn taken) my way through the leaves, the dog poo and the occassional frisbee and then i see a tree, it's large, oaky (i'm not good with types of trees, flora and fauna scientifics!) and i stop.

There's a bench - and there's someone on it. It's a he of course!!!! (Geez). And then i don't know, it mists up again. Now i'm not sure, given NLP, and hypnotherapy being quite popular, whether it's from another lifetime, or whether it's the future. I can't really see his face, i can sense it, i kind of have a very hard boom booming of the heart, i feel like i've found something very significant (it's never happened before so i obviously know that it's a big deal). There's a smile, and i do sit down, it's like it was meant to happen. I haven't a clue after that. I just hope it's not after i'm married with kids, and a husband! I trust God wouldn't be that cruel to me. I know he wouldn't do that.

So if you're out there, i'll see you at Hyde Park, yeah?

4 comments:

gadarene said...

join the club sis!!...write u later...

Meg said...

Hey brotha, tell me about the link Mitts was talking about, and hey, i thought Dr.Suess found you? ;)
So Hyde Park's out of the ques, for you! Or is it? Mail me!

gadarene said...

hey Sis,
Dr.Suess found me allright but how can i be sure when 'Dr.Suess' & yours truly have'nt met personally yet...hate to be the killjoy but it does matter wot?...Hyde Park's never out of the question luv...twist in the tale is will i meet someone there? or be there with someone? or just me & my mind?...options options...i tell you!!...mail t'ow promise...work is driving me nutz...

Meg said...

Well, Hyde Park stands for a lot more than the park bench, don't it? It's been hard coming to terms with putting up the profile, i made sure i typed it according to what i'd say from the heart, and it's been a journey honestly...sigh...neway...
You're right, bro. Meeting Dr. Suess is key. I hope it's going okay in the meanwhile...bonded a lot more? Take yer time, i know work must be crazy, in the meanwhile this here story will keep it going...:)