Thursday, June 08, 2006

What are the odds?

What are the odds of a mood swing in a day in the life of Megha Abraham?

I'd say a million to one. After flying to Dubai, i've come to a point in my life, where i need to battle my negativity, that has so easily made being a royal sore to myself. I've pretty much spent enough energy to light up a small town for a week, just being anal about the city and its lack of depth.

Apart from it being a fact, i am not choosing how i'm supposed to react to it. See, that's a choice i HAVE. And i'm not exercising it. Call me stupid and i'll concede (just this once...).

As i was driving to work this morning, the radio blared out a song that i've heard a million times before but never really paid attention. Wake Up.

Wake up it's a beautiful morning Tra la...remember?

Well, there is part in the song that tells you that it could be the last time you're looking at the sky and you'd never know it, so wake up and enjoy what you have...yada yada?

Well, it nevers struck a chord before, but it did today. I guess all the stars had aligned for the epiphany, so i went ahead had it. The epiphany.

So i relaxed my brow and looked up at the Dubai skyline on Sh. Zayed road and yeah...it was a pretty blue. And i do realise that we're all in this here place to learn and make the most of what we have, and so i might as well, get my plans in order and start focussing on how i can be in a better frame when i look at everything and wait my turn.

Yeah...i've gotta go write a press release and finish up an editorial calendar...not really spiffy stuff, but it pays the bills and allows me the dream of saving up for better.

The lonliness reminds me of what i had and let go of, it reminds me that we all have a reason for what we do, and although sometimes it hurts like crazy even now, we just walk on...knowing somewhere there is a reason and time for every purpose...yeah...under heaven.

Do i think little of everyone else? No i don't, in fact i think that those micro manage like the life beneath the duff, is an empire to conquer in itself. A world where details least noticed is the sealing factor to most successes. It is the armour in a large mass of fighting warriors without which no battle can be complete. It is the ranks, the form and the files that set an organised fighting body from a mean course and uncouth mass, where no discipline or carriage can cause a riot within one's own ranks and the enemy mocks at their hardly fought victory.

Such is the importance of detail. For it speaks volumes and yet is never noticed in the larger scheme of things. In hindsight it is recalled in appreciation and wonder. And although credit is not received when one expects it or wants it, it arrives in times you may never know or understand and set in motion wonderous cycles of gratitude that swamp you in pleasant surprise and confusion. And then a deep and very comfortable warmth that settles the uncertainity in your being, telling you how much of a difference that one extra gesture cost you then, but reaps richly now.

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